Does anyone else feel that these Secret Wars minis are crap?

Seriously. This isn’t a slam against the creators; it just that it feels like these stories are being told because people want to keep their job (as opposed to having legit stories they want to tell). Take, for example, Future Imperfect. Great fuckin’ artwork. And I don’t even like Greg Land. Normally, his stuff always seems stiff and photo-refferenced all over the floor. However, he destroys it on Future Imperfect: he’s got tons of bulky, exaggerated Hulk and nice, dynamic action spilling of all the actions scenes.

Ruby Summers
See what I mean? This stuff is DOPE!! (that’s Ruby Summers, Cyclops and Emma Frost’s daughter from the future)
Yet, despite the amazing art job, the story has a plodding pace that kills any enjoyment of the first 4 issues. The final issue, however, is really frickin good. So good that it almost made up for the bore contained in the first four.
Which leads me to my point: this should have a been a single issue, done-in-one story. Cuz that’s about how much story there was too tell. Yet, since it was a Marvel Event, and editorial needed a 5 issue story, this one, very good story was stretched to become one long story that wast mostly all boring.

Which is a lot more than I can say about the other Secret War mini I am going to mention: Spider-verse. Now I bought this book because I am collecting every appearance of Spider-Gwen.

Doesn’t do much in this story except fail at making new friends.
But fuck you Marvel, ‘cuz you know that there are a lot of people like me who were going to buy this book since the millisecond it was announced. And because of that, you knew you could throw any schlock in between those covers and it would sell until the last issue. And you did.
Again, I don’t know if I would fault the creators: I liked the indy feel to the art, and the writer did a good job at differentiating all the different Spider-characters. However, the plot was a very basic “we need an excuse to get these characters together as a team”, and as we now know, the book is just a lead-in to the upcoming Web Warriors series (stupid idea, IMO- the original Spider-verse was a lot of fun, now please let it die already!). Thank God-Doom for Spider-Ham. Spider-HamEvertything he says in this book is gold, and each of his scenes are maximum entertaining. His interactions with the other characters almost make up for the flatness of the plot.
I haven’t read any reviews yet or heard legit word-of-mouth on any break-out minis that are like OMG I GOTTA HAVE THIS. (Remember how the original Edge of Spider-verse was like that?) If I do hear/read/smell anything, I’ll share it here.

Holy wow I didn’t expect this book to be this good!!

One of my über smart friends from college picked up one of the random books I had in my pile on day. It was written by Zander Cannon. My friend was all, “this guy knows his story construction.” or something along those lines. Dude was smart, so I took his word for it and bought more issues. I never actually read them- still have them somewhere.

Years later, I see this book, Kaijumax on the shelves. I don’t like Ultra Man, or giant monster movies, or Godzilla or even prison movies (except Shashank Redemption). Yet, somehow, I am loving this book. Give it maybe 3 or 4 issues if you aren’t feeling with issue #1 (I’ll admit, I didn’t feel that issue either). The story takes a few issues to put the pieces into place, but once it gets there things really take off.

The final issue of the 1st story arc is released this Wednesday, which means if you can’t track down all of the back issues, the collected trade paperback should be available soon.

in honor of Batman Day (or whatever it is people are talking about)

batman bust w inksLong story short, because of a viral crap thing, I needed to change my profile picture to a picture of Batman. I was trying to think of something creative to use, like a picture of Adam West in costume, when I figured that it was time to pick up a pencil again and draw my own picture. I did this in a few hours (most of the time was spent trying to navigate the crappy paint program on my iPad 3 that I used to color it). I WON’T be giving a plug to that program. On a tangental note, I need to check out if the new super iPad + Apple pencil is cheaper than one of those monster Wacom tablets that let you draw directly on your art. Cuz that’s what I need in my life.

A little edumacation about PSYCHOSIS (for comic fans and creators)

One mistake that I see all of the time in comics: writers will talk about “psychotic” characters.

from Spider-verse #4 (2015)
From Spider-verse #4 (2015).
Page 14, panel 4.
Cletus Cassidy (aka Carnage) is one example of a character who is constantly identified as psychotic. He’s a murderous psychopath. Which is cool, except for that there’s NOTHING about being a murderous psychopath that makes you psychotic. Psychotic people have visual hallucinations or they hear voices, feel spiders crawling on them or crap like that, or they’re all frozen and catatonic. They don’t kill people, they’re not remorseless, and they certainly don’t act anything like Carnage.

Now that I’ve said it, can people please reblog this to help spread this knowledge? Maybe people who make comics will get to read it.

Likin’ the new Ghostbusters team

The new Ghostbusters are here. Check them out:

Know what’s sad? It’s sad that I almost expected female Ghostbusters to be wearing form-fitting uniforms and to have model bodies. Not “almost”: I did expect that. It’s literally a fucking shame, because yes, I am embarrassed to admit that I expected women Ghostbusters to be depicted sexually. But my expectations were wrong, and I’m glad they were wrong. Cuz what we got was 20 fucking times better than what I was expecting!!

There was nothing sexy about the original Ghostbusters: they were goofy, bumbling and funny. I like that a team of female Ghostbusters will be in this new film, and they’re keeping the same comedic feel of the first movies. They look bad-ass. They look rag-tag. They look like underdogs, and if there’s one thing we liked about the original team of misfits, it’s that they were underdogs. Let’s hope that this movie kicks as much ass as this team shot is promising, and let’s hope that people are willing to receive something different from what they were most likely expecting.

Dumb Shit

I hate when people say dumb shit, like, “Sienfield is a show about nothing.” Of course it’s a show about something! It’s about four unmarried people living in an apartment complex who philosophize about the mundane. A show can’t be about nothing, because then there would be no show.